Waiting

As we're waiting to hear from our agency, waiting for that call, we're trudging forward getting the house ready for a baby.  We will be moving Farmie's "closet" which is actually a spare bedroom one room over to make room for the nursery so that it will be closest to our bedroom.  I already ordered a crib and dresser.  Once we get a call I will move forward with ordering everything else, but since it could be 6 months from now I feel it's a little early to get everything.  But maybe that's also from our experience with IVF and really wondering if the day will ever come when we will have a son or daughter.  The IVF experience has left me questioning that because it feels like we've been waiting forever already.  It bothers me that I'm hesitant to just order everything, but I am and I just have to accept that it's probably from the disappointments we have already faced.

A few months ago I took on a new partnership at work and I just took on another.  Both know our plans to adopt.  They are very supportive of our choice to adopt and the fact that I will kind of be taking it day by day to see what will be feasible once we have a baby.  I'm very blessed to have the opportunities I've been given this year and I hope to be able to maintain them working from home.  Today I'm working on organizing a system to help me keep track of everything.  I'm trying to create a system that will be as low maintenance as possible.  The partnerships know that if I start struggling to maintain everything I will bow out, but they need my help in the meantime and are ok seeing how things go.

Farmie is out of town for work and I'm going to make it my goal to have our adoption portfolio completed by the time he gets back on Wednesday.  Building the portfolio is a lot harder than I expected, but I think I've gathered enough photos from over the years to get it done.

We haven't heard anything from the agency since submitted our application.  Getting the portfolio done will give me a good reason to touch base again and get an update.

Sorry I haven't been very chatty and commenting like I normally do on everyone's blogs.  I feel like I've moved from foster care, to IVF, and now to adoption and it's a very different place emotionally.  It's another transition and I'm feeling pretty alone in this part of journey.  Similar to how I felt in the beginning when we were struggling with finding out about Farmie's infertility issues.  But I know that I'll deal with this as well and find some stable ground.  It's just an adjustment!